I have been putting this off since it is not a pleasant subject to meditate on. I have also had so much drama in my family which has hindered me from posting for a few days. Had to drive into town which is an hour back and forth.
Any way I was stripped for track marks and I believe cuttings. I do not do either by the grace of God. So humiliating. I had some bug bites and had to say they were bug bites with the nurse writing everything down. I also have psoriasis and had to explain that. It is on my ankles.
The night nurse- It was by then midnight- had me take sleep medicine. Since I was lied to at the beginning and I wanted to sleep to make the horror go away so I took the trazadone and ativan. I conked until 7 a.m. until I was awakened by loud noise which I discovered was the kitchen person bringing breakfast.
I did not want to eat, but they would allow nothing in my room and I have low blood sugar a lot, So I forced myself to eat what I could. I am nor used to eating breakfast. I know it is supposed to be bad, but for me but once I eat I crave chocolate-even if I eat a big meal.The longer in the day I put off eating the better. I am just an out of the box typed person. It works for me. The rest of the time in the hospital I believe I ended up eating more than I ever have in my life. I was afraid not to eat well and have the low blood sugar attack. Now you could ask for snacks at the desk, but I actually just wanted to be away from the nurses as little interaction as possible. I am not always good at asking. (introvert) and some of the nurses acted put out. Some of the hospital food was extremely good and some was lame. I also seem to have an ocd thing with eating with people I do not know so I had to pray to not be revolted.they also had a TV. blasting shows that were not a help for my repulsive feelings. The room was also kind of dirty. When I got restless I started wiping the tables myself on the last couple days of my stay.
The DR.: The first DR there was - and you had to wait for awhile -with no witnesses- said very abusive remarks. He threatened things. he may have had dry humor and really no one said much to each other in there because "the walls have ears" so I never knew what others thought of this "joker." He threatened to not let me go home to my family, to throw my husband in the hospital and such things the 3 days I saw him. On Saturday we had a different doctor. he was the total opposite of the other. Kind ,and he let me out 2 days early.Which I had been praying hard for.
Medications: They put me on a bunch of medicines. One given me- and I at least give the kudo's to the churlish doctrine for the new anti depressant he put me on. It actually has done wonders. They also put me on what they called an anti psychotic and I was not even psychotic. This drug caused me unable to sleep by the 2nd night upon taking and psychotic symptoms. I had to pray through it asking it not to effect me.
Speaking of sleep. I slept from 12- 7 the first day and I went back to sleep for most of the rest of the day except for supper, when nurses came to check my vitals and or give me the meds. My room mate slept also that day. I had been horrified to see I would be sharing a room. The room also was dark and I hated to turn the light on to bother her, but by afternoon day 2 I was not able to sleep so I had to read or could not stand it. As far as I know my room mate slept all the time except meals and I had thought I would sleep like that to make the time go by like maybe she would do. As I also have stated before, the one drug they put me on made me manic at night, but I was told by the grumpy physician that if I refused my meds-which I could do-he would keep me for a month- so I endured and told no one.I prayed. ( You can refuse the pills, but if you do you will bear the punishment.)
Other "patients": almost all the other patients in there with what I could discern and hear were in there because of drugs in some manner or another connected to fighting, clashes, recklessness or of the same.( I felt vindicated by my blood test showing I had no illegal drugs or alcohol in my body.) One saw me reading my bible and asked me some things. when he left , he asked for me to pray for him. I have been trying to do it daily. I really-even though that was the most I talked to any other one in there with me-did not have much interaction with others as said. I also have mentioned my introvert personality.(When I get among many people I do not know, I find it hard to converse.) If I am around one person or people I already know I can talk their "ear off." I do believe also that many were inhibited to talk since anything could be used against you. Several things stick out with my fellow patients:
One lady that seemed pretty normal, but would fade in and out. All I could think maybe she was perhaps schizophrenic . This lady was missing a limb and in a wheel chair. she kept trying to sneak in one of the young guys rooms. I also saw her laying completely naked on her bed where you had to see her when you walked by. I did tell the nurses this was going on and they took care of it. I also saw the young guy that she was trying to sneak in with walk by her door and I was
apprehensive that he may have seen her also spread out.
Since I am finding this is taking more writing then I had anticipated with this blog, I am going to cut out here and do another post on the hospital experience. I just know if something is too long I will not attempt it. So to find out what took place after the unclothed bed incident tune in for a later posting I have also missed some things I wanted to say in my sections above. Next time:What happened with this young man-that may have been connected to the exposed woman on her bed in her room.
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| Exactly how it was waiting for the DR. Though nurses no longer dress like this. |
